Happy Mother's Day

     I have been reading some blogs this week about Mother's day. As I was reading,I started thinking about being a "mom" and being a "stepmom". I am a biological mom to two great adult "kids" and a stepmom to a great teenage daughter.As I look back and think about the last 4 years of being a step parent I have learned a few things I would like to share this Mother's Day. Blending a family does take time and there will be "bumps" along the way. I always strive to show a positive attitude as a mom/stepmom.This is something I learned from my mom and I want to pass that along to my children.Try to find the good in all situations. There may be times that you think there is nothing "good",but strive to see even a "tiny"bit of good.This can be difficult at times in step parenting.There is no greater job and no greater reward of being a mom/stepmom.I pray that you are blessed on this Mother's Day!

     

COMFORT

      I have been away from the blogging world for some time now. I felt myself getting burned out with it and just needed a break. The last time I posted was 5 months ago. The stepmom life is continuing to grow and change each day. Some days I feel like I am taking steps forward and some days taking steps backwards. This is not with just step parenting,but in most relationships this happens.

     Lately, I have had a heavy heart for my son who graduated from college almost a year ago and is still looking for a job.Did I also say that he is living with us? He desperately wants to find a job and move out. I have been finding myself with a rollercoster of emotions as a mom and a stepmom.They each bring about different issues and challenges.

      After talking with my husband today,I am so desperately trying to enjoy this time of my life and the detours it has taken.I am trying to enjoy each day whatever it brings. I have so very much to be thankful for-one is a husband who supports me and is there for me. I find myself seeking peace and comfort. I have looked for this in many things-work,money,material things. I know that to truely have peace and comfort that I have to look to God. I have to surrender to him daily,sometimes hourly and let him handle all the "stuff" in my life.

     "YOU ARE GOD-YOU ALONE-OF ALL THE KINGDOMS OF THE EARTH.YOU MADE THE HEAVENS AND THE EARTH."(ISAIAH 37:16).

       I want to leave with this thought-If God made the heavens and the earth,then I know that he can handle all the 'stuff" in my life.


       CONTINUING THE JOURNEY!!

Happy Fathers Day

        Behind every good stepmom is a good husband.For a step family to be successful it is imperative that the dad be an active participant. As a stepmom, you may feel prepared and determined to tackle the job of being a stepmom, but without your husbands support, it is impossible. If your husband is an engaged parent with his children in the home, your role as a stepmother becomes much easier. I am so very blessed to be married to a great husband and dad to his daughter. The qualities he has as a dad remind me how blessed we are as a family.He is committed to his family and child.He spends more time with his child than the ordinary dad and thinks about how to nurture his child.He knows his child's needs and temperment. He strives to be involved in his child's life-school,friends and church.He models a healthy,loving relationship with me providing a model of a healthy marriage.He is the spiritual leader for our home.He strives to grow in being a husband and father. In doing this, he brings many blessings to me and his daughter. Thanks for all you do!

     

     Happy Father's Day Mike!! Love you!!

Put Your Marriage First

         I have been in a FUNK lately! I have not had the time or motivation to blog lately. I have had some extra stressors in my life and the devil has been showing up here and there. I am off from work this week-YIPEE!!! I plan to get some rest and relaxation.
          I read an article a few days ago that concerns stepfamilies and I want to share this with you. A recommendation made in this article is that when a stepfamily is formed,the marriage relationship MUST come first.The children should be prepared in advance that the pre-existing parent/child relationship be reduced to the "backseat". I feel this is very important in stepfamilies. It is in everyone's best interest that a new stepfamily succeeds. As I continue on this journey of step parenting, I struggle at times how to spread my time with all individuals involved-my husband, my 2 sons and my stepdaughter.This changes everday due to circumstances and everyone's schedules, but I firmly believe in PUTTING YOUR MARRIAGE FIRST.This will secure the child's sense of wellbeing in the long haul. Continuing The Journey!
        

Celebrating Step Mothers Day

           With Mother's Day a week away, I was giving some thought as to how stepmothers are viewed by society.The stereotypical image of a stepmom needs an update. The term stepmom carries a negative connotation in some circumstances.Being a stepmom in some cases has the stereotypical image of "WICKED".Becoming a 2nd mom to someone elses children is not easy,but millions of women have taken on the task.Stepmothers need to be recognized and honored also.No one can take the place of the child's own mother ,of course.

            One of the things children face in blended families is being torn between 2 sets of parents.With this in mind, I have read and heard about "Step Mothers Day" being celebrated the Sunday after Mother's Day. This may be a good idea for some family situations. This week as a stepmom, do something nice for yourself . Pamper yourself, take a bubblebath,watch a movie, spend time with your spouse.

            Help your step children to honor their BM on Mother's Day if possible. A good way is by helping them with gifts. One year I helped my step daughter make a photo book for her mom with special things written in it by her. I took photos of my stepdaughter and let her pick out a book to put them in.It was fun for both of us and was also a very personalized gift for her mom.

            My hope is that as a stepmom you will have a very special day!Continuing The Journey!

Dealing with the Whys of Step Parenting

       When you become a stepmom there are many times you ask the question-WHY? Why is being a stepmom so hard at times? Why can't a spouse and their ex get along for the childs sake? Why do people harbor so much resentment that it affects their health after a divorce? Why did my child not want to come to visit me on my weekend to have them? Why so many lies? Why do some people think stepmoms are wicked? Why did my stepdaughters biological mom die at this time of her life?
        As I was walking recently,I was asking God some WHY's and this is what I am learning. God allows all of us to be tested and when you are a step parent you are definitely tested and ask WHY many times. God knows about all of our "stuff" we have in our lives.He knows what is going to happen in our lives and what we are going through and will go through. .I am learning to try not to fix and solve everything in life.I am learning to quit asking God so many WHY questions and to let him be the ruler of my life in all my problems.God can handle all of our"stuff" if we just let go of our worries and WHY's and give them to him.Are you surrendered to give him all your stuff? Continuing the Journey!

Taking a Break

I am taking this week off from blogging. We are on SPRING BREAK!!!!! I will be back next week. I am also getting a few little changes to my site! Hope everyone enjoys your week. Continuing The Journey!